Live a Humble Life

It is very important that you realize that you do not achieve your goals alone.

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I talk a great deal about empowerment and ambition, but I also know that I cannot do anything by myself.  In my book The Ambitious Woman, I remind my readers that when you realize that you cannot do it alone and that your success was really the efforts of others as well, you are humbled.   It pays to remind ourselves of how others contribute to our success as we form our goals and pursue them.

An ambitious woman is one who does not flaunt her success but instead gives credit where credit is due.  She understands exactly what others have contributed to her life and their contributions inspire an attitude of gratefulness in her.  In fact, an unknown person said, “Greatness is humility that doesn’t need to be noticed.”  I love that quote because to me it embodies the truly grateful spirit that accompanies real success.

In my life, I have had reason to be grateful to many people.  First and foremost are my husband and children.  They have supported me through every phase of my life and they are the real reason I have worked so hard to achieve what I have.  If you have a family who loves and supports you, you are already the richest person on earth, no matter what your bank account says!  Remember that when times are hard or the going gets rough.  Remember that your loving and caring family is often the springboard for your greatest achievements.

Living a humble life is not only about recognizing others’ contributions, however.  It is also about acknowledging our own limitations.  The flipside of ambition is overconfidence.  If we succeed too much, there is a danger in us saying, “This is because I am great.”  That is rarely the case.  You are great, make no mistake, but rarely is that the only reason for success!  Keeping a humble attitude allows you to be respectful and grateful for all the things people have done for you as well as keep your own attitude in line with reality!

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NOW is Your Time to Be Empowered

There is one thing that defines a woman who is successful in her business and personal life…

Empowered

… and separates her from women who are not successful. Empowerment is the term we use to describe a woman who has been given the tools to succeed and has used them to attain her goals.  The empowered woman is a woman who is working hard and achieving the things she wants to achieve and who is enjoying success as she moves from one goal to another.  You may think that this does not describe you, but it could!

According to Steve Maraboli, “The empowered woman is powerful beyond measure and beautiful beyond description.”  If you have ever seen a truly empowered woman, you know that this is true.  Empowerment lends a beauty to a woman that she does not possess otherwise.  Therefore it should be a goal for every woman, no matter what her walk in life.
However, many women believe that being empowered is an accident.  They think that some women are lucky enough to be placed in situations in which they receive support from their family and employer and somehow become a great and successful business guru.  Actually, nothing could be further from the truth!  “To empower” is an action word, and it occurs when a woman takes control of her own life and her own destiny.

This is not to say that we do not have some control over empowering others as well.  When we empower someone through our words, actions or attitudes, we give them the ability to direct and control their own lives.  Empowering someone means setting them free to be what they were intended to be!

In order to enjoy empowerment, however, the empowered woman must take responsibility.  This means that she takes on the task of handling the things that directly affect her life and her goals.  Being empowered is not about being controlled, but being in control!  You have the power inside yourself to be whatever it is you want to be.  Do you want to lose 20 pounds?  Make $500,000?  Be a part of a successful company?  Have a supportive and nurturing relationship?  Whatever your goals are, they are in your control.  You make choices that determine whether you are empowered to achieve these goals or not.  Start today making the choices that empower you to reach your dreams, whatever they may be!

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Ambition is NOT a Dirty Word

I have met many people who seem to believe that being called “ambitious” is an insult.

AMBITION

Even worse, some of these people have no problem with a man being called “ambitious” but feel that it is insulting to a woman!  Ambition is not a dirty word; in fact, it is the gas that fires up the engine that gets many things done all over the world every day.  Are there dangers associated with ambition? There can be.  Ambition should never rule us, but it should drive our decisions and our actions, especially in the realm of personal development.

The definition of ambition is:  “Having a strong desire to succeed.”  There is nothing wrong with that!  We should all have a strong desire to succeed and be willing to do what it takes to make success a reality.  Most ambitious people have a “never-give-up” attitude.  They already know, before they start something, that it will become difficult at some point and they have already made up their minds that they are simply not going to give up.  If you decide not to give up before it becomes hard, you can work through the difficult times more easily.

There is another thing that I believe people misunderstand about ambition.  You choose to be ambitious just as you choose to have a positive attitude.  Many people think that you are simply born ambitious or positive or negative or whatever personality trait is in question.  Nothing could be further from the truth!  Perhaps some people find it easier and more natural to be positive, but anyone can cultivate a positive attitude.  Similarly, anyone can cultivate an ambitious attitude.

Remember that ambition is not a dirty word!  It is something that you need to grow in your own life if you want to be successful.  Some people call it a “stretch goal” or a “big dream”; I call it ambition at work!  Set your sights high and work hard, and you can achieve anything you want to achieve in your business and in your personal life.  Make a goal and chase after it, and when people call you “ambitious,” tell them “Thank you for the compliment!”

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Something Is Only As Scary As Your Mind Tells You It Is

Confidence is the Secret to Success!

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One of firebrand Sarah Palin’s most famous quotes is, “You know the only difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull?  Lipstick!”  Some people criticized Palin for that remark, but it can certainly be true!  Your level of confidence has a direct effect on the results you achieve, whether you have a lot of confidence or none at all.  If you do not develop confidence, you cannot ultimately achieve the things you want in life.

Confidence certainly worked in Sarah Palin’s favor.  She was the youngest woman and first female governor of Alaska, and she was also the first Republican female vice presidential candidate.  Sarah Palin knows the secret of success:  confidence.  It is foundational to every major achievement and sets you apart from everyone else.  The larger your confidence, the larger the level of dreams you can carry!  If you dream big, you must develop the confidence to carry those larger dreams.  Otherwise, the world will convince you that they are impossible and you will eventually give up.

Confidence does not mean that you are self-centered or self-aggrandizing.  It is rooted in reality.  Having no confidence is, in a way, just as selfish as having too much!  Your confidence level must reflect who you really are, but it should also motivate you to stretch for higher goals.  I would have to say that most women suffer from too little confidence rather than too much.

Tia Singh wrote a poem entitled “You Are Amazing.”  In it, she describes in detail the qualities of an Ambitious Woman:

“Warm. Giving. Generous. Quirky. Sexy. Funny. Smart. Flawed. Whole. Scared. Brave. And so, so, so. much. more.”

Being an Ambitious Woman is not easy.  However, it is so rewarding that it makes the work you must do to attain the title worth every moment!  When you focus your time, energy and passion on a goal and make it your own, you do become a “pitbull with lipstick!”  While some people may take that as an insult, I take it as a compliment.  An Ambitious Woman knows what she wants, goes after it and ultimately gets it!

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One of the Biggest Lies of Our Time Is-

The idea that in order to be an Ambitious Woman you must
be a career woman, working mom, wife and all-around role juggler.

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Actually, you can be an Ambitious woman in almost any role.  Barbara Walters, a great role model who recently retired after 50 years in the entertainment and news business, says, “A woman can do anything. She can be traditionally feminine and that’s all right; she can work, she can stay at home; she can be aggressive; she can be passive; she can be any way she wants with a man. But whenever there are the kinds of choices there are today, unless you have some solid base, life can be frightening.”  However, without the belief that you can do anything, you may never achieve the goals you have set for yourself.

Actions always follow decisions.  You must convince yourself first in your mind that you should do something, and then the action itself will follow.  Until you decide it in head and heart, however, the actuality of the event will never occur.  This is why it is so important to build passion, because from passion comes motivation.

One of the greatest enemies of passion is people pleasing.  It will cause you to be divided within yourself.  Remember that others may not have the same goals for you that you do!  When you try to please everyone, you are necessarily taking away from your own dreams and passions to pursue what someone else wants.

This is not to say that you should focus only on yourself.  However, you should be aware of how much time you have to devote to others and keep yourself within that limit.  You must also set your own goals and set aside time to pursue them vigorously, even if the people around you do not support your actions.

An Ambitious Woman always believes she can do anything she sets her mind to do.  Barbara Walters is a wonderful example of the Ambitious Woman who is able to achieve what she wants because she has the flexibility to allow others to pursue their own dreams.  Try to surround yourself with people like her; besides being a mentor and a great role model, these Ambitious Women are able to help you achieve your own goals through their support!

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