Sheryl Sandburg is the Chief Operations Officer of Facebook
and a working mom and wife.

She is also the author of Lean In: Woman, Work and the Will To Lead.  Over and over in her book, Sheryl points to something that seems to be missing in many of our daily lives:  discipline. Without discipline, you will never achieve your dreams because you will not have the organization and strength to move toward them in a way that guarantees success.

Discipline is not a difficult concept to understand, but it is sometimes very difficult to put into action.  The word comes from the Latin disciplina which simply meant to “teach or guide.”  Later, the word took on a negative connotation:  to scourge or beat into submission.

I prefer the original Latin meaning.  Discipline means teaching yourself or someone else to follow a pattern that brings success.  It also embodies the idea of choosing to improve and setting your sights on the future.

Let me give you an example of how discipline should work.  Let us suppose that you have the goal of running a 5K race and placing in the top 10.  Remember, the more specific your goal, the more likely you are to achieve it!  What does discipline and learning have to do with this goal?  Plenty, as we shall see!

First, in order to place in the top 10, you must find out what the top ten average speed is.  Are these people running a 15-minute mile or a 10-minute mile?  The faster they are, the more vigorously you will have to train to reach your goal.  As for running 5K, if you have never run before, it is time to start thinking  about getting out there and putting the feet to the road!  However, you are probably not going to run 3.1 miles your first time out.  How do you get from sitting on the couch to running a 12-minute mile?  Discipline is the answer.

I promise you that if you get up this morning, put on your shoes and walk 3.1 miles at a brisk pace, then increase your speed gradually every single day over the next three months, you will be running that 5K.  This is because you are disciplining, or teaching, your body to accept that type of physical activity level.  As your body gets used to the work, it becomes easier.

Be it your career, relationships or motherhood- It is vital to put a focused, diligent effort into what you want to achieve. Discipline is one of the best qualities to carry when leading by example.

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I have met many people who seem to believe that being called “ambitious” is an insult.

Even worse, some of these people have no problem with a man being called “ambitious” but feel that it is insulting to a woman!  Ambition is not a dirty word; in fact, it is the gas that fires up the engine that gets many things done all over the world every day.  Are there dangers associated with ambition? There can be.  Ambition should never rule us, but it should drive our decisions and our actions, especially in the realm of personal development.

The definition of ambition is:  “Having a strong desire to succeed.”  There is nothing wrong with that!  We should all have a strong desire to succeed and be willing to do what it takes to make success a reality.  Most ambitious people have a “never-give-up” attitude.  They already know, before they start something, that it will become difficult at some point and they have already made up their minds that they are simply not going to give up.  If you decide not to give up before it becomes hard, you can work through the difficult times more easily.

There is another thing that I believe people misunderstand about ambition.  You choose to be ambitious just as you choose to have a positive attitude.  Many people think that you are simply born ambitious or positive or negative or whatever personality trait is in question.  Nothing could be further from the truth!  Perhaps some people find it easier and more natural to be positive, but anyone can cultivate a positive attitude.  Similarly, anyone can cultivate an ambitious attitude.

Remember that ambition is not a dirty word!  It is something that you need to grow in your own life if you want to be successful.  Some people call it a “stretch goal” or a “big dream”; I call it ambition at work!  Set your sights high and work hard, and you can achieve anything you want to achieve in your business and in your personal life.  Make a goal and chase after it, and when people call you “ambitious,” tell them “Thank you for the compliment!”

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When Life Gets You Down and Things Happen That Were Not Part of the Plan, The Most Important Thing You Can Decide To Do is Move On!

It is going to happen, no matter how well-organized you are, how hard you work or how nice of a person you are. You are going to come to a point where you simply run out of luck and skill and something goes wrong. If you want to achieve success, you will have to address this issue, learn from it and move forward. When the only thing you can do is move on, keep going and do not look back!

It may not have anything to do with you but it may affect you. Sometimes these “down times” can be devastating: the call from the doctor’s office you did not want to hear. The person in your life who suddenly and inexplicably turns against you. The sibling to starts a family quarrel and tries to draw you in. The employee who is rapidly becoming a liability instead of an asset.
You have been there, as have I. We all know that sinking feeling we get when we realize that things are going very, very badly. However, there may be little we can do to halt the process of something negative. Sometimes, we just have to move forward.

C.S. Lewis said, “Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing the monkey bars. You have to let go at some point in order to move forward.” What are you holding on to that will not let you move ahead? Is it an old relationship that still has a hold on you, even though you would be better off without it? Is it a feeling of guilt or shame? Is it fear of the unknown?
Whatever is hindering your success, move forward. You can learn from it if you move on and keep going in the right direction. Ultimately, if you put one foot in front of the other, you will come out successfully on the other side a wiser, stronger and better person for your experiences!

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You Are a Strong, Powerful, Motivated Woman!

Nancy Brinker is a woman whose name you may never have heard. However, I am willing to bet you have heard of her greatest accomplishment: the Susan G. Komen Foundation that focuses on research for a cure for breast cancer. Did you ever wonder who Susan G. Komen was or why her name is attached to this incredible organization? Here is the story of Nancy Brinker and how “be motivated” could be her motto!

Nancy Brinker’s sister, Susan G. Komen, died of breast cancer at age 36. While this was devastating, Nancy could have taken the attitude that this type of thing happens all the time and it was just “bad luck.” Instead, she used her powerful motivation to send a message to the world: a cure for breast cancer is possible if we believe and work hard.

She began the foundation and sponsored walks in various neighborhoods to raise breast cancer awareness. She adopted the pink ribbon as the symbol of dedication and motivation to finding a cure for cancer. By the year 2009, her organization was so large that the president awarded her the Presidential Medal of Freedom, the highest civilian honor in the land, and she was named one of times “100 Most Influential People.” Her hard work and dedication paid off not only in recognition but in the cultural change she enacted almost single-handedly. Her refusal to allow her cause to be ignored resulted in truly great strides forward in breast cancer research.

Nancy Brinker was motivated by her sister. All of us have something that motivates us. Perhaps your motivation is your family or some other group. However, no matter what your source, motivation is what drives you to success. A motivated woman is an ambitious woman. As I show you in my new book, The Ambitious Woman, without motivation it is hard to drive yourself as you will have to do in order to succeed.

Be motivated. Be strong. Think about all the things you can accomplish and what women before you have accomplished simply by grounding themselves in strong motivation! While teamwork is important, there is no “we” in motivation; when it comes to pushing yourself, it is up to you to do the work!

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 You Never Actually Get To A Place Where You Can Say, “I Have Arrived.

I never have to set any more goals and I never have to work to change myself in any way again.  I can simply stay right here and be happy.”  I wish I could tell you that the work stops at a certain point, but it does not.  Frankly, I am actually glad, because if we were allowed to “rest on our laurels” most of what we achieve would probably never happen!  Keeping ourselves busy and always setting new goals is what keeps us vibrant and engages our brains, keeping them quick and agile even into our sunset years!

It is amazing to me how the older a woman gets the more incredible things she can accomplish.  While I love my young friends, and I am so proud of the amazing work young women are doing in today’s business world, I have to say that in my experience the older ladies really have the experience and knowledge necessary to do incredible things.  We spend our entire lives gathering the skills and the know-how to run a business or achieve other goals, so it is no surprise that “experience counts!”

Whether you are young or old, however, the same rules apply to be an ambitious woman.  You must be accountable, be humble, be consistent, be loyal, be ambitious, be empowered, choose wisely and have the right attitude.  Ultimately, when you change yourself, you begin to make changes in the world around you.

You’re ready to make a difference!  Ambitious Women want to march forth, bringing others along with us, and make an impact on our world.  However, we cannot do that without being willing to do the hard work necessary to make ourselves successful.  Bill Bradley put it well when he said, “Ambition is the path to success.  Persistence is the vehicle you arrive in.”  Stick to your goals, work hard and develop the right attitude about your work and your life and you, too, will make a difference as an Ambitious Woman!

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Confidence is the Secret to Success!

One of firebrand Sarah Palin’s most famous quotes is, “You know the only difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull?  Lipstick!”  Some people criticized Palin for that remark, but it can certainly be true!  Your level of confidence has a direct effect on the results you achieve, whether you have a lot of confidence or none at all.  If you do not develop confidence, you cannot ultimately achieve the things you want in life.

Confidence certainly worked in Sarah Palin’s favor.  She was the youngest woman and first female governor of Alaska, and she was also the first Republican female vice presidential candidate.  Sarah Palin knows the secret of success:  confidence.  It is foundational to every major achievement and sets you apart from everyone else.  The larger your confidence, the larger the level of dreams you can carry!  If you dream big, you must develop the confidence to carry those larger dreams.  Otherwise, the world will convince you that they are impossible and you will eventually give up.

Confidence does not mean that you are self-centered or self-aggrandizing.  It is rooted in reality.  Having no confidence is, in a way, just as selfish as having too much!  Your confidence level must reflect who you really are, but it should also motivate you to stretch for higher goals.  I would have to say that most women suffer from too little confidence rather than too much.

Tia Singh wrote a poem entitled “You Are Amazing.”  In it, she describes in detail the qualities of an Ambitious Woman:

“Warm. Giving. Generous. Quirky. Sexy. Funny. Smart. Flawed. Whole. Scared. Brave. And so, so, so. much. more.”

Being an Ambitious Woman is not easy.  However, it is so rewarding that it makes the work you must do to attain the title worth every moment!  When you focus your time, energy and passion on a goal and make it your own, you do become a “pitbull with lipstick!”  While some people may take that as an insult, I take it as a compliment.  An Ambitious Woman knows what she wants, goes after it and ultimately gets it!

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